Everything is Green

I have had a passionate love affair this summer. Our time together is spent entirely in the sunbaked hours. At times we allow others to share the enjoyment of our company, however the love is most pure while listening to Built to Spill jam sessions alone. The best part of it all is that everything is green.

“Will you birdy? Will you bogey? It doesn’t matter much. Just keep your head down and swing right round and soon you’ll be in the cup.”

The golf season is just about over. I’m surely going to take every advantage I can to get out there in the chilly weather. The feel of the club hitting the ball just right and watching the little white dot fly through the sky and land gently on freshly cut grass is what keeps me coming back.
 

“I never saw that boy in you locked behind your eyes.”

As I watch these older men approaching their seventies and eighties still able to give their balls a good stroke, they all have one thing in common. There is that youthful gleam in their eyes as they watch their shot soar. Even if their limbs are creaky, their minds fading, and their distance diminishing, they are still able to hit a ball and compete.

“In the woods what will we find? This day was made for you and I.”

 

Essex Green's "Everything is Green" has been a favorite song of mine for at least half a decade, however this discovery of the songs true meaning was never as clear as the gorgeous melody. Ah! the mystery of a well crafted tune.

Une Vie Rangï

Sometimes I wonder if there is any possible way I could settle down, move to North Dakota and live of the land. There is nothing more perfect than Pavement’s “Range Life” to examine the possibility of a middle class twenty something contemplating whether or not he can live a life of mundane obscurity. How I wish I could have this pop song playing in my head for all eternity, luckily there are so many lyrics that have stuck holes in my head to satisfy the craving.

 

“Hey you gotta’ pay your dues before you pay the rent.”

 
This is where I’m at right now in life and have been before. Money isn’t something that’s given, but growing up in an upper middle class family can at times feel like a life of luxury. However very quickly we discover that work must be done to earn these amenities.

“Until you snort it up or shoot it down your never gonna’ feel free.”

Drugs are something that temporarily heals the gaping void of existence. Filling that void with passions is rewarding, but so is the temptation of mixing drugs together with passions.

“School’s out what did you expect?”

So many kids go to school expecting bliss and for the most part receiving it. Then the big chill hits and you realize that the rest of your life a waits. So far I have found one true way of dealing with the continuous prospect of career building, relationship hunting, and peace of mind.

 

“Dreamin’ dream dream dream.”

 

We Are Underused

We all lie. Even it’s in the most subtle of ways. The most glorious part of a lie is that it never has to end, it can be ridden like a roller coaster until we die. All songs are lies. All movies are lies. All relationships are lies. Simply put I want to be entertained, and if a story is told that is has a copious amount of lies that's fine, just make sure hit nails me to my core.  Our instinct is to fabricate the truth. Pavement's gem “We Are Underused”, is an epic tribute to all those who stick honesty in their back pocket for the sake of a good story.

 

 

"Let's drink a toast to all those who will ride a lie, to tell about their struggles in hushed tones around the fire."

 

Don Jon

The wait is over; a film has finally been released that explains the alienation of our youth through media. A woman in her fifties stated while leaving the showing that the movie was pointless, everybody knows that a meaningful sexual relationship is better than meaningless sex. My quick response was, "You would be surprised as to how many people thrive on living such a lifestyle.”

The film's opening segment shows many well know clips of sexual breakthroughs in cinema, music, and television, such as Fast Times at Ridgemont High, a scene that most men and women born in the late 50's to late 60's must have had fond(ling) memories of. The montage continues into the narrative as the first third of the film allows a peek into a Jersey Shore like onslaught of raging hormones and sexual escapades. Our main character Jon begins as a ladies man addicted to sex with women who look like models from magazines, while going home and enjoying masturbating to women who look like whores too sexy to work the streets. His outlook on life changes by the end of the film, but his character does not, allowing the audience the luxury of not being forced to suspend any sort of disbelief.  

The largest mystery of the film posed to myself is what 'cars' represent. Several key scenes take place on and off screen with vehicles. Early on Jon states that his 'ride' is one of the few most important things he values. The meaning clearly points towards Jon's macho sexual nature. However the vehicle he drives also keeps him in a shell, much like pornography allows him to lose himself. Don shows no fear in shouting to the ignorant drivers of New Jersey, until eventually he punches in a car window forcing him to show the emotion of pain. Later in the film John chooses to have sex with the older and more mature Esther in the back seat of her car, a very vulnerable place to make love. Later in the scene Esther reveals that her family was killed in a car accident sadly stating, "Cars can be awful things," or something to that affect. However they still make beautiful love putting Jon into a sexual frenzy porn has ever given him. After sleeping with Esther, Jon is seen driving in his car ecstatically bouncing to "Good Vibrations" by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch completely lost in love stricken bliss. Jon is bellowing the songs chorus as he reaches a stop light where an Asian couple shoots him a disconcerting smirk. Jon does his best to shy away from the embarrassment. I do not believe we ever see Jon in a vehicle again.

Eye contact also plays a large role in the film. While picking up women Jon can tell immediately if the woman is interested. It seems to be a sort of primal force between humans. This continues throughout the film in a variety of ways. Upon dating Barbara, the romantic comedy obsessed Jersey girl peach, there are very subtle downward glances by her character. She is constantly playing the game of hard to get, a trait that the beautiful bombshell has no doubt picked up from the entire ersatz ardor she watches on the big screen every day. Scenes within the church are both the most comical as well as the most frustrating. The comedy lies within the Catholic Churches readiness to forgive their followers through a private confession addressed to a Priest who in turn passes the sins onto the one and only God. This leads to a line I laughed at with glee. After Jon told the Priest he had only slept with one woman several times out of wedlock, and did not engage in any pornographic sessions. The Priest again advised him to say ten Hail Mary’s and ten Our Father’s. Jon’s response had me rolling in the isle, “Father, how do you come up with these numbers?” Jon is never shown within a church again.

It’s great to see a movie in my dreams produced and released. Although my top ten films list of 2013 is still in progress Don Jon is in the top 3 along with Frances Ha and Upstream Color. Certainly seeing more of the Martello clan characters fleshed out would have been intriguing. Exploring the Martello’s may have given insight into exactly why Jon was brought up to become the man we despise, yet still root for as our protagonist. Although director Joseph Gordon-Levitt gives us clues through an honest depiction of what family life is like at the Martello family dinners, there is never any fleshed out dialogue sequence between any of the family members. Perhaps that is the intention of the film. This family is so close knit that meaningful words cannot really be spoken at the intellectual levels craved by a more intelligent film viewer.

Keep working Joe, you are extremely talented, after viewing Brick there was no doubt in my mind you were going to explode onto the scene. Hollywood has caught the bug too, so cash in on some good Hollywood blockbusters, then go back to fine tuning your beautiful craft. hH

 

Reasons

"Every Now's a big surprise."



 

In the name of all great liars, I would like to admit that every sexual experience I've ever had has changed my life drastically. Every person that has entered my life has made an impact. Every song that has filtered through my ear drums has led me to dance. Every drug filtered into my blood has subdued me to bliss. Every film I've ever viewed never made my eyes even the least bit weary.

And every time I've time fallen in love, that love has slowly faded. These are all reasons to be weary of any life changing moment. Because all of life is both monumental and meaningless. The colors, shapes and sizes are in a constant change. 

Other People

Other people drive my life. I love underground rock done by Anton Newcomb and Matt Hollywood. I crave new movies by Shane Carruth. Anyone who tries to imitate Lennon or Reed can take all of the little dimes left in my pocket. Still, despite all my faults and unwillingness to conform, my life continues and thrives! Tomorrow may never know... 

 

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Oldman

My playwriting teacher first told me how amazing the film performances of Gary Oldman truly were. She threw in Daniel Day Lewis as his near equal, but looking at both actors in full there is truly only one master. In a film history class the same professor screened Sid and Nancy which not only indulged my punkish craving but fueled the filmmaking craze I was hooked on at the time. Looking back the first film I probably saw from him was The Fifth Element.

Zorg was such a villainous presence to a ten year old, but fifteen years later every scene is hilarious. Dracula remains to this day to be terrifyingly brilliant. Gary brings such an amazing human nature to all his rolls. The final scene of Dracula smooching the chick from Beetlejuice spurs a particular memory of me questing my father, "Why is she kissing that gross old man?" The Professional was the first time I was truly moved consciously by an Oldman performance and it remains my favorite. Although familiar I didn't realize he was the same actor from the other films that I had seen him in. His ability to transform his body contortions as well his accent is brilliant and his performance in True Romance is what got me completely hooked and fully aware of this range. I'm about to watch The Contender, which is one of the last films that I haven't seen in the Oldman film catalogue. Honestly I do not know what to expect from Gary playing a villainous Republican politician. I'm very curious as to why the population as a whole doesn't recognize Gary as the great actor that he is. His chameleon nature and lack of any noticeable facial features, such as his buddy Tim Roth's nose for example, surely allows him to roam the streets and screen with little paparazzi assiduity. As Gary gracefully ages his performances are becoming more internal, in turn showing his endless range as a faker. Whether or not the Academy recognizes Oldman's ability to internalize his emotions in turn leading to a long overdue Oscar is still up in the air. One thing is certain, Oldman is the best working actor in Hollywood and I anticipate every performance with glee.

Straight Up and Down

"We don't want you to be yourself you see, we want you to free your self."

 

 

 

I love you don't drag me down. Because when I'm with you I truly don't care if I'm living or I'm dying. You say that you are my very best friend, but you never can tell. I can make you believe. Hey Jude!

 



If You're Feeling Sinister

Gathering together to spiritually connect seems fugal in the sense that we all hold our own individual holy spirit. This is precisely why we get these sinister feelings at different times randomly throughout our lives. Waking up feeling sinister is an emotion to cherish. Belle and Sebastian relate this perfectly and melodically in "If You're Feeling Sinister". The sinister emotion is very childish in nature. All children have unruly thoughts and are typically unable to recognize the emotion and thus will act upon it. It likely stems from jealousy or perhaps social isolation. As adults we have learned how to filter out the emotion through various outlets. For example by listening to a jangly tune by a band that fills the empty space in your heart with a childish joy.

Going to Acapulco

"It's a wicked life, but what the hell, shit everybody's got to eat."

 

Tomorrow is Monday morning, most people in their right minds are about to start another week of work in an already fading summer. But for those of us privileged enough to sleep in on a Monday morning in August keep the dream in mind. There is a place in this world for everyone. A nook and cranny for each of our eccentricities. Someone once told me as I put on Dylan's "Going to Acapulco" that Bob has made a living off writing songs that force people to feel depressed. This is a true enough statement, but that doesn't mean it's all true. Dylan writes songs that are filled with hope to those feeling lost in their lowest moments. He then picks you up and slam you down simultaneously. In this particular song he proves my point with the lyric,

"Well, sometimes you know when the well breaks down, I just go pump on it some."

 

Happiness is driven by the fuel of Monday morning's. While the Sunday night blues are difficult to fathom, the question remains, what are we really dreading about a beautiful Monday morning that is so unbearable. Whether you love your job or feel as though nothing will ever be okay, there is still meaning in something. Next Sunday's episode of Breaking Bad should be worth the full work week, I mean the upcoming dialogue between Hank and Jessie can easily unhinge our souls forward for another work week. God damn, take me away from this dull dream.

 

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The Repudiated Immortals

Watching the film Upstream Color has brought me back to all this existential Elephant 6 malarkey. I saw of Montreal live in 2007 just as they began to descend from their climactic progression of three straight masterpieces. Not that Kevin Barnes past and present work hasn't been stimulating, but this was the first time I was able to see a band I loved in their prime. Dylan, Neil, Ray were all great, but that was circa '71. All it takes to make a great pop song these days is to create a catchy bass line combined with sexually provocative lyrics, for example this summer's jam, Robin Thick's "Blurred Lines". "The Repudiated Immortals" has a third aspect that being intellectually stimulating. I love being able to re-listen to a song over ten times and still not understand what is behind the blurry lines of each verse. What does Barnes mean when he blurts out?

"It's just the heaviness that comes with knowing you will never die."

Perhaps that is what the immortals felt upon creating us meager humans. Or perhaps it's knowing that in creating the song itself he has a created a ghost in itself and that ghost will live on forever. Whatever Barnes meant I'm sure it's now cliché.

Hilltop Procession (Momentum Gaining)

"Don't worry now what's on TV, it'll just be boring."

So lost are the continual yearnings that bewitch this existence. This constant betrayal of what is in front of our faces for whatever comes next. Is whatever image you're currently pulling up on your smartphone better looking than me? Not to sound cocky but I can entertain you for a good twenty minutes of solid conversation before you'd tire of me. Then again,

"Don't look to me to validate your dreams."

Just try and remember how amazing everything in this world is. The chances of us being anything at all is extraordinary. At times the angst is overpowering, but remember those fleeting momentous moments of happiness.

Upstream Color

The loss of self control is overabundant in this highly original work. Upstream Color could be referring to our constant uphill struggle in life. We endlessly do our best to swim against the current, when in the end, no matter how powerful the rapids, we succumb to it. Plants seem to be taking over our world with reckless abandonment. They dominate our planet and minds without mercy. Yet we refuse to acknowledge much else besides their beauty. This visual treat is filled with real human emotion, along with loads eerie scenes that will make your skin crawl. So regardless of what Shane Carruth was truly attempting to say with this film most viewers should be thoroughly entertained.   

Some Kinda' Love

"The possibilities are endless."

Love is like happiness, it only exists in our memory. We only love the previous incarnations of each other. Few humans still live in the moment anymore. The past is so elegant while the future is full of anxious ecstatic energy. Love is like the color light green in that it exudes a life like quality of ferocious tenacity. A timid being is only capable of a love that excludes determination. To truly be engaged in this emotion we need to pursue to an endless mindless dystopia. Just like all past-times the pursuance of love is filled with a selfish collusion. Nothing in this life is done with complete genuineness. Thus the underlining meaning of Lou Reed's Some Kinda Love track from the Velvet Underground's self titled titillation.

"Let us do what you fear most."

Oddly, or maybe not so much so, every band I listen to these days has blatant similarities to Lou Reed, John Cale's New York experimental journey. The guitar fills and repetition was like all pop music but they had an edge like all the other bands, which is truly what separates them from the other bands of that time period and location.

"Between thought and expression, lives a lifetime."

The Wild Kindness

"I'm gonna' shine out in the wild silence and spurn the sin of giving in."

Everyday upon waking up there are two choices, give up or give in. The finale of the Dave Berman and Stephen Malkmus masterpiece American Water is breathtakingly quaint. Berman asks a wild flower how to be wild yet silent. Ah the duality of humanity.

"Behind the walls of medication I'm free"

Disrupting brain chemistry in order to feel a sense of freedom. If man feels only happiness will time cease to exist?

"It is autumn and my camouflage is dying,
Instead of time there will be lateness,
And let forever be delayed."

The Malkmus solo after this verse is ungodly. Imagine a bud blooming into a beautiful flower. Thank you so much Silver Jews for creating something out of nothing.  

Dig for Fire

Music is best when it is distorted by the clouds. The melody peaks out like the setting sun. Passion oozes from the lightness. Calm repetition of the sea below angles towards the seashell. Trapped between the night and the day, the dark and the light, brief tonality of imperfection within the reality. While an end is certain, the sounds will never stop. And when you move you don't move, no, you don't move.

 

 

 

So come along lads, ladies, and all those immune to the clinically impervious and enter a palace of genuine geniality. Change is the only promise we can offer up to those willing to forget and pine away. Because as the prophet says 

"Nothing happens 'till you try, so come on try"